Baby Announcements!

I had such high hopes of keeping this blog updated in a timely manner!  Not only for anyone who cares to read it, but also so that I’ll have a record of my pregnancy to look back on.  So this is me getting caught up! 🙂

I am 15 weeks pregnant now, which is CRAZY and EXCITING and TERRIFYING.  At this point, pretty much all the most important people in my life know about Baby Nugget.  The last few weeks have been spent announcing it to those people.  We still aren’t announcing it on Facebook yet, and it still might be a while for that.  But I feel a little lighter now that we’ve announced it to who we have.

First was my announcement at work.  It was getting increasingly difficult to hide it at work.  I’m not showing at all yet, but I’m so tired and so sick and I don’t know how many times a day someone asked me how everything was going with the fertility stuff, or “Is there a baby in there yet?” while poking at my belly.  My vague answers weren’t going to cut it for long, and call me superstitious, but I felt a little weird lying about being pregnant.  Plus, as you remember my friend AJ that I work with is also pregnant and only 2 weeks behind me, so I had a deadline since she could announce her pregnancy at any time.  I knew she was waiting until her next doctor’s appointment to announce, and that gave me 2 whole weeks to bask in the attention and be the only pregnant girl.  So I was given the perfect opportunity, and I took it.

A couple weeks ago Dr. E {one of the doctors I work for} scheduled a last minute staff meeting for the entire clinic and surgery center over our lunch hour.  Every single person that I work with was gathered in the lobby of our office.  Dr. E bought pizza for everyone and we stuffed our faces as he and our administrator talked about our mission statement and company vision and how we all contributed to it and blah blah blah.  We broke up into groups and did a silly activity and soon we ran out of time and the meeting was over.  Dr. E stood up and said that’s all he had for us and for everyone to have a good afternoon at work.  Everyone began to stand up to leave, so I jumped up and yelled, “Dr. E! Can I say something real quick??”  He said sure, and everyone stopped and looked at me.  So I said, “It’s not really work related, but since everyone was here I just wanted to announce…that I’m 12 and a half weeks pregnant.”

I cannot even begin to describe the reaction I got.  I barely got the sentence our and the room erupted with an ear-piercing scream.  Seriously, imagine 30-something women all screaming in excitement at the same time.  You would have thought someone had told the whole room that they had just won the lottery.  It was AMAZING.  I expected people to be happy for me, but I did not expect the reaction that I got.  People bombarded me with hugs and congratulations and one of the girls in my department had tears streaming down her face when she hugged me because she was just so happy for me.  I never expected so much genuine excitement and love from the people I work with.  It was an amazing day. 🙂

My announcement to my family on the 4th was a little less exciting, but just as powerful.  I was going to do the picture thing, but my mom ended up having to work and my husband ended up being sick that day, so things didn’t exactly go as planned.  I still wanted to tell them on that day because I didn’t want to put it off any longer.  Especially since I had announced it at work already.  Hubby came to my aunt’s house with me for dinner but didn’t eat much, and soon after dinner asked me if I cared to take him home {we only live about 5 minutes from my aunt’s house, so it was no biggie}.  I knew he wasn’t feeling well, but I didn’t want to make the announcement by myself.  So I gave him the ultrasound picture I had brought with me to show off and told him to just take it over to Granny.  Everyone had already and eaten and were just sitting around talking, not paying any attention.  So Hubby walked up behind the chair my Granny was sitting in and handed her the folded piece of paper.  All he said was, “I was told to give this to you,” and then he walked away.  I watched her unfold the picture and look in disbelief.  She never said a word, she just covered her mouth and started crying.  It took a minute for anyone to even notice!  Finally my aunt asked what was wrong and what was in her hand.  Granny showed her the picture and it went from there.  🙂  It wasn’t crazy or cutesy or anything super special really, but my heart is pretty happy with the way it happened. ❤

Since then I’ve let some of my closest friends in on the secret that didn’t know yet.  I called my friend J just the other night to tell her, and she was crazy excited of course.  She and I have been friends since the 9th grade and always talked about having kids at the same time.  She experienced a big loss a couple months after my miscarriage in 2011.  She was pregnant and nearly full term and sadly her baby was stillborn.  We were both so excited when I had found out I was pregnant, because our kids were going to be the same age and be best friends.  Then I miscarried, and then her tragedy happened.  She got pregnant again and now has a 7 month old.  She has been anxiously awaiting the day I got pregnant again and was more than happy for me.

My other best friend is a different story.  I’m still pretty pissed off with how it went down.  I hadn’t told her yet because I was waiting until I told my family.  She and I have been friends since the 2nd grade.  I love her and she is practically a part of my family anyway.  She’s very close with my family and even works with one of my aunts.  Its not that I don’t trust her, but I know how loose lipped she can  be sometimes, and I knew I needed to wait and announce it to her when I made the family announcement.  She is family, after all, right?  Well, unfortunately, I didn’t get to tell her my big news.  Because someone else did it for me.  A girl that we went to school with started working in the surgery center I work in a couple months ago.  She’s a sweet girl and very nice.  We aren’t good friends or anything, but we do know each other.  I went to school in a small town, and she and I knew each other from kindergarten until 12th grade.  It was one of those schools where you knew everyone in your graduating class because it was a small town you had been in school together since you were five.  But we aren’t close by any means.

I made it clear after my announcement at work that we weren’t facebook official yet and that my family wasn’t finding out until the 4th, so please don’t say anything anywhere.  I figured my wishes were pretty clear.  This girl even came up to me the next day in surgery and congratulated me and asked if I was excited.  I explained to her the condenses version of my story….we had been trying for over two years, we’d had some losses, we were ecstatic but scared and not ready to go super public yet so to keep the news on the down low.  Again, I was pretty sure I had made my wishes clear.

I had barely told my family yet.  It was the weekend after the 4th, and I had planned to see my friend, L, in person that weekend and show her my ultrasound pic.  But before I had a chance to meet her that night, she texted me earlier in the day saying she had heard a rumor.  About me.  She I’m like, what is it?  Of course she tells me that its that I’m pregnant.  I tried to laugh it off and asked who she heard it from.  I thought at first one of my family members had told her, which honestly wouldn’t have made me as mad.  But no.  The girl we went to school with who now works with me told her that I announced it to everyone at work.  Kinda hard to back out of that one.  I guess L had ran into her because one of the girl’s friends works with L and the girl was meeting up with her friend there.  I’m not sure why she decided to announce my pregnancy, but L could tell I was pissed on the phone and said that she probably assumed she already knew since we were such close friends.  Maybe that’s the truth.  But you know what?  I don’t care.  I know she hadn’t worked with me as long as everyone else has and didn’t know my whole story, but I made it perfectly clear that I didn’t want it made public knowledge yet.  If she mentioned it just randomly running into L, a girl she hasn’t talked to in ten years since high school, who else has she mentioned it to??  Does she not realize how incredibly rare and special this is for me??  This may be my one and only chance to conceive.  Possibly my only pregnancy and I don’t even get to be the one to share it with one of my oldest and closest friends.

Here’s an idea.  If its not growing in YOUR uterus, how about you keep your mouth shut about it??  I am still livid about the whole thing.  And no, I haven’t confronted her about it yet because I’m afraid I might throat punch her and lose my job.

So other than one of my closest and best friends finding out from an almost stranger and not me, my baby announcements have been pretty great.

I’ll try to keep up with the blog better!  No promises though!! 😉

Another One Bites The Dust

Boo.

Boo.

Yep. That’s a negative pregnancy test. Taken by yours truly. Not that I really expected anything different. But I realized today was CD35 and AF is no where in sight. And how crazy would that have been, to have my appointment with the RE on Monday and to totally be pregnant this cycle. But nope. Not happening.

Let’s commence with the bitching, since that’s what I’ve been so good at lately. Shall we?

Yesterday a girl that I used to work with posted a vague status on facebook that went a little something like this: 12/12/12 has been the best day of my life since the day I married my wonderful husband! To which someone asks…why? To which she replies: Can’t tell yet ::smiley::  Now, I knew the moment I read it that she was pregnant. Someone had posted a little while ago that it was time for her have a baby, and she had said they’re working on it. If you’re trying to hide it, you’re not doing a very good job. Then 10 minutes later she posts a picture of her positive pregnancy test. Wow. Really waited a while before you told people, huh?

I just Do. Not. Understand. where these people get off announcing that they’re pregnant as soon as they get a positive test! You’re, what, five minutes pregnant?! Don’t you understand all the things that could happen in the next few weeks? Days? Hours? Just another example of how infertility has affected me. My brain. My emotions. I would never be so brave as to announce that I was pregnant the moment I took a test. I didn’t tell my parents that we were pregnant until we were 7 1/2 weeks and had heard a perfectly healthy heartbeat. And I miscarried four days later.

Ugh.

To top all this off, I walked in on a conversation between a few girls at work about how they’re so glad they had their kids young and that they had never planned to have kids once they were 30, because that was just waiting too long. Well, this 29 year old appreciates the fact that you think I’m out of time and should just give up now. Since I’m too old and all. Too bad I didn’t start trying when I was much younger. Oh, wait. I did. Bitches.

And that concludes another horribly negative post. Enjoy!

Yet ANOTHER Pregnancy Announcement

Really, Universe? REALLY???

Two weeks ago I posted about my cousin’s impromptu baby announcement on Thanksgiving.  Today, at my company Christmas party, I got another one.

It was shaping up to be a fantastic day.  Half a day in clinic, then down by the river for the party. Super cozy holiday atmospere.  Record player playing old Christmas tunes in the background. A traditional Christmas feast catered in, which turned out to be WAY better than the italian food we’d had for the last 3 years at these things.

So, we’re in the line for the food, served up all buffet style. I’m piling on some mashed potatoes when I hear one of the doctors I work for yell out, “Preggers is holding up the line!” Of course, my super sonic infertile radar goes up at the mention of the word ‘preggers’ and I’m glancing around like what the–

So yeah. THAT’S how I found out that yet ANOTHER girl that I work with is pregnant. AGAIN. I think I’ve mentioned before that I’ve had to suffer through 4 baby showers at work since we’ve been TTC. Well, this girl was one of them! When we started trying in October 2010, she announced shortly after that that she was pregnant with her second child. Yes, second. That means this one is her THIRD. THIRD! Um, selfish much?? I mean, the two girls that I’ve had to watch walk around the office being pregnant for the last nine months have both finally delivered. Now I’m in for another nine months of baby bumps being shoved in my face every day? Holy sweet baby Jesus.

I hate that this blog is basically one big long bitch fest one right after another, but REALLY?

I really hope I’m being set up for some HUGE payoff in the end. Because if not, eff you, Universe.