Follistim, Party of One

CD19, folks! It’s been a bit since I updated, and a lot has happened the last 19 days! Let me break it down for you.

 

1. Provera was hateful to me and Letrozole was kind. Had a baseline ultrasound done on CD3. My Cycle Coordinator, H, has been wonderful in working with me and having some labs and other stuff done here locally so I don’t have to take off work as much. I got to go to Dr. L’s office for the baseline ultrasound and the girls there were ecstatic to see me. The ultrasound tech even used me as a teaching device that day, since my ovaries have a perfect string of pearls. I’m pretty much textbook, folks.

2. I began my very first cycle of Follistim. We started out with 75 units on CD’s 8-10. On CD11 Hubby and I made the 2 hour drive to have my midcycle ultrasound and labs done. It was uneventful. No mature follicles to be seen. So I was instructed to continue the Follistim 75units a day for the next 5 days. Then on CD16 we would return for another ultrasound to check things out.

3. I’ve become a pro at jabbing myself with a needle! Hooray! At first it was a little tough. I mean, it didn’t hurt, and I knew it wouldn’t hurt. But it’s like my brain wouldn’t tell my hand to give myself the shot! Crazy. But eventually I got the hang of it and I’ve been shooting myself up like a mad man.

4. Back to the clinic 2 hours away for our 2nd ultrasound on CD16. We got some good news. Actually, great news! There it was, on the screen. The most beautiful big black blob I’d ever seen. One mature follicle measuring 19mm. Bigger than Dallas right there on the screen. When she told me I closed my eyes and asked which ovary it was on. Luckily, it was on the RIGHT ovary! The left had a few little ones that weren’t mature yet. And the right only had that one. But oh my gosh, it was amazing. And it only takes one, right? I was pretty much giddy the whole way home. It’s just an amazing feeling to finally get some good news! After the last several cycles of my follies only growing to 12mm and then stopping, this is fantastic. I love Follistim. LOVE IT.

5. So we triggered that night at 8:00. Sexy time like crazy the last 2 nights {and probably tonight, just to be sure!}. Yesterday I was having bad period-like cramps most of the day, with some twinging of my ovary. I’m not sure if that’s a good sign or a bad sign.

 

So there you have it. Starting out the TWW with pretty high spirits. I’m always very careful not to get my hopes up, but it’s just so hard this time around. I don’t want to jinx it…but I’ve just got this feeling…. Fingers crossed!!!

 

 

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Grow Follies Grow!

CD14.  Ultrasound on Monday showed 3 follicles on my right ovary (yay!) and a couple of very small ones on my left.  The ones on my right ovary were around 11mm, which Dr. L felt was a little small.  A second ultrasound 2 days later (today) showed that they hadn’t grown any.  Boo. Dr. L mentioned to me Monday that it boggles his mind how inconsistent I am.  Great numbers one month, absolutey nothing the next.  Bad numbers another month, but then I end up ovulating, presumably late.  He said I may just ovulate late this cycle, so it’s basically a wait and see situation.  I guess I’ll get some OPK’s and test the rest of this week just to see.  He’s out today and the rest of the week, so the ultrasound tech said she’d leave my scans for him and have him call me on Monday to see where to go from there.

When I saw him this week, he mentioned doing some lab work if I don’t ovulate this cycle to rule out premature ovary failure, since, like I said before, I’m so inconsistent.  I haven’t done much research on it (purposefully) because I don’t want to freak myself out unless I have to. But let’s just all please cross our fingers that this is not the case.  I have enough stacked against me as it is!

Good news is my appointment with the RE has been moved up to December 17!  I had to move it because my boss was being a bitch and wouldn’t let me take off on the 2nd, but at least I’m getting in quicker.  I’m ready.  I just hope boss lady understands that when this process starts, there’s no rescheduling appointments.  I go when I have to go.  I thought she understood this.  We had a very long conversation about this over a month ago and she said she supported me and would work with me on it.  We’ll see how that goes.

Everyone have a wonderful Thanksgiving!  I haven’t been doing the 30 days of thanksful thing, but let me just say… I hate that any of us have to go through it, but I’m so thankful for a community of women who know and understand exactly what I’m going through.  ❤

Sexy Time. Again.

Gone were the days of scheduled intercourse, coming home after a long day from work, looking at my husband with a complete lack of interest, and thinking, “Let’s just get this over with now so we don’t have to worry about it after dinner.”

Sigh.

Or so I thought.  Here’s your warning: This post may include some TMI moments {Do those even exist when you’re TTC???}.

The past 3 cycles have been fantastic.  Before I started the Letrozole we did a month of BC.  Then my next cycle we did the IUI.  The next cycle was a bust because I was ovulating on the wrong ovary.  So for the last 3 months, my hubby and I have been able to actually enjoy sex with each other whenever we WANT, not just when its on the calendar!  Its been amazing.  And I thought it would continue that way, since we’ve decided to keep trying with the IUI approach.

WRONG.

I went in for my Day 12 ultrasound on Monday {the 17th}.  There were 3 follies on my RIGHT ovary {Hooray!} but they were a little small. Two 10’s and one 12.  Dr. L actually called them pitiful.  Thanks, Dr. L {I still love you}.  I talked to him about my weird cycles the last two months, with the light spotting for 2-3 days before I actually started any heavy duty bleeding, and he said from now on he wanted me to start counting Day 1 on my first day of heavy bleeding.  In light of this news, he said that I could actually only be on Day 10 rather than Day 12, so he wanted to see me back Wednesday for another ultrasound to see how my little follies were growing.

Cut to Wednesday {the 19th}  {Side Bar: This is one year to the day that we heard our baby’s heartbeat for the first time.  Four days later I miscarried. This week has been a rough one.}  I go in for another ultrasound.  At this point I’m on Day 14, or Day 12, depending on if you counted the first two days of spotting I had as cycle days. Oy.  My little follies grew 1mm.  Still pitiful.  Dr. L said he was expecting them to grow at least 2-3mm.  He said it was very possible that they would mature and I would still ovulate, but at that point he didn’t see enough to warrant spending the money on an IUI.  Plus, as it was looking, if I DID ovulate, it was looking to happen on the weekend and while he would come in to do it even though the office is closed, the lab that does the sperm washing is closed on the weekend {Since Dr. L is just my OBGYN and I’m not going to a fertility clinic *yet*, which would obviously be open 7 days a week, this is the luck of the draw}.

So you know what that means… me and the hubs get to have Sexy Time this weekend.  And lots of it.  Sigh.  There’s just something about having to do it that makes me not wanna do it.  I know you know what I mean.

On a brighter note, I haven’t been nearly as crazy or close to a mental breakdown the last few weeks.  I finally called Dr. L’s office and told them I was losing it, and he prescribed me a low dose of Zoloft.  I was pretty hesitant at first.  I’ve never taken anything like that before and I was afraid it would make me a zombie.  But so far its done the trick without compromising my personality, and I only have 3 refills so its only a temporary thing.  I did some research on it and its prescribed to a lot of women who have severe PMS symptoms {which….HELLO, hormones!}.  The girls at work have even mentioned that they’ve noticed a difference in me.

Ok. So back to the follies.  So that makes today either Day 16 or Day 14.  Depending on how you’re counting it.  I haven’t done any OPK’s or temp charting, partly because I didn’t think I’d need to and partly because they just make me crazy.  But I did notice I had a little CM today {gross, I know}.  So hopefully my little follies are growing and all the Sexy Time we’re about to have isn’t all for nothing!

Just curious… If you’ve done IUI or monitored by ultrasound, what size are your follies usually on day 12 or 14?  Just so I have something to compare to.  I’m really hoping maybe I just flubbed up my days and we’ll ovulate just fine.  But as usual, I’m not getting my hopes up.  I’ll know for sure next week if we ovulated when I go in for my bloodwork.

Until then, have a good weekend!  You know what I’ll be doing! {Ha!}